President Trump knew it was wrong to shove the prime minister of Montenegro out of the way at the NATO meeting today; but when someone shouted that it was time to “take” the group picture he only heard the word “cake.” Still high on adrenaline from delivering such an awesome, jaw dropping speech, he raced to the front of the line and bumped the poor bastard. Truth was he didn’t know it had even happened until he snuck onto Twitter for a second when his aids weren’t looking. “Jesus”, he mutters, remembering some of the twit pics, “did Ivanka look hot in that veil.”