“Hawaii, Ha-why-eeee, Ha-wha-eeeeee,” U. S. Attorney Jeff Sessions practiced the name of that Muslim President’s birthplace in the mirror for a solid hour before his infamous appearance on The Mark Levin Show. As soon as he heard himself say “I really am amazed that a judge sitting on an island in the Pacific can issue an order that stops the President of the United States,” he was as surprised as…well… everyone who saw it. He was going to eat his weight in fried green tomatoes and banana pudding after flubbing this one up so badly. 

Dammit, he knew this word, he knew it.